Trust

Nov 2020

Shaykh Abid Khan (Al-Salam Institute) | Etiquettes of a Student

❝This is an important point, sisters, brothers... And I mean, 'important' underlined twice.

Your relationship with your teacher. Your relationship with the Shaykh.

I want you to understand the importance of.. . -for your benefit, not for his or her benefit!

Your benefit lies in trusting your teacher.

I'm not saying for them to go beyond any acceptable boundaries. But, having confidence and trust in that relationship.

This is another form, for us, in our situation, of isti'jaal, of a hastiness. No, don't do it that way. You have to trust your teacher. What I'm saying is....

I myself feel at a loss, at how to get this point across, because it is so big... you cannot take it just from these words. My words are a reduction of the reality because it's just a description. I need you to live it, for you to succeed.

The point I'm trying to say to you is this.

You have to trust them to know actually what is good for you.

What you need to study, when you need to study, and how you need to study it.

There will be certain issues. The equivalent of tinkering around the edges, where you will know better, or you will kind of... Basically, your own study technique when you go home, how you revise for an exam, etc. No one's going to say, you know, trust me, I have infrared vision, I can tell you that you're a visual learner, and you're a kinaesthetic, and you're an auditory learner. Some experienced teachers... None will have infrared vision, but some may be able to advise.

What I'm saying is, in terms of many things...

When you're learning Arabic, many students find it very difficult. Many of them are working professionals and smart!

Basically, you'll think, if something is not rocket science, I should be able to understand it. I should be able to get it. And if I'm not getting it, the problem must be something with other than myself. Maybe it's the teacher, or maybe it's the style. That's a problem.

The second problem is you thinking there is a problem [that you don't understand the content]. laughs Maybe that's what you're meant to do in the beginning of your studies! [struggle to understand]

We hear from our mashaayikh... I can tell you from my own tiny share, in my own very short journey of learning.... that you enter a class and you understand nothing sometimes. And I tell you what, those moments end up becoming the sweetest moments of your life. When you understood nothing. Not only spiritually because it reminds you that I am nothing, and I know nothing... But even in terms of your growth. It's so satisfying. When you look back, you realise you picked up a new language.

Even if you already knew Arabic, there is a new language to each discipline, to each science.

I get to see this continuously in my own classes. I've seen this even with Shaykh [Akram]. I'm seeing my own students in his classes, literally, learning to swim afresh! But it's that struggle which is such a blessed struggle — and they begin to learn the language!

The real challenge is to persevere.

I mean, I really can't afford to labour the point any further... I hope it's making sense and there is some value for yourselves.

It's very awkward for me to say what I'm about to say, because it's about myself, and we are taught we should not talk about ourselves. It's from the etiquettes. Again, it's an etiquette that is lost on us millennials... I'm not sure if I am a millennial. Talking about oneself, one shouldn't do that. We are even told, don't even say "I". The iPhone, the I this, I that, MySpace. It's so focused on the self. I'm not saying this gadget or that gadget. They chose the name out of analysis and recognition of the state of our times.

I shall try and avoid saying I, by just telling you the story of a brother.... Who was trying to study Arabic. This is, you know, when he was young, obviously... The memory is so clear... of trying to study Arabic and just... not being able to make head or tail of anything. At all. I say at all, but maybe you could get up to knowing marfu, mansub, majrur, but not past that. The same thing with tajwid, actually. I don't mean melody, I mean the correctness of the recitation. It can prove so challenging. Some brothers or sisters would be able to tell you about the neck aches. You end up just pored over the books, trying to make sense of it. Not because you don't have a teacher, but because it requires your own graft. It's a journey of love, and a journey of graft.

The secret which we like to tell our students when teaching Arabic, is the fact that... I always tell them that.... The way it works is a bit like a snowball effect.

I'll give you a silly example... Idaafah. Just didn't make sense to me. I may have kind of, blamed the teacher in my mind at the time. Shamefully. Mabniy? What on earth is mabniy?! But you know, if you cannot understand idaafah, you cannot move on in life! laughs

No, seriously! It's the most peculiar construct. It looks nakirah but it's actually ma'rifah. It'll have single sign, no alif lam, yet it will be ma'rifah. I thought, this is it, I'm going to be left behind. My sins must be too many. I thought that and many students feel that.

Another block comes and you think, this is it, I can't go further. Previously, it stays shut for a few days or a few weeks, but this time, it isn't budging. But you wake up one day and it makes sense. That pattern will never end, until you die. You need to trust the teacher. You need to put in the effort and the time, and that's it. I don't know how to say that any other way, in English, or in any other language... laughs❞

End quote

Allah preserve and bless the teacher, his parents, and his teachers' teachers. <3